G BABY'S REVIEW OF:
ALFIE (2004)

OPENING THOUGHTS

    This movie is a remake, of course, of the 1966 film Alfie. I haven't seen the original but it was nominated for best picture, and the new one wasn't. So I'm going to assume the original was better. But I'm also going to put my balls on the table and say the girls were hotter in this movie. But have you ever noticed that people who are currently old still seem old even when you watch them in their early movies? I saw clips of Michael Caine from the original and he looked way old. Sean Connery looked like he was 60 in Darby O'Gill And The Little People, and Katharine Hepburn always looked like an old lady. Is it just me? Am I crazy? Please tell me. I want you to.

ACTING

    JUDE LAW was pretty good in this movie. He was slick and cool and I found myself wanting to be just like him. For a long time I wasn't sure about Jude Law. He's one of those guys that all the girls drip about and it pisses you off. But I can admit he's got some skills. He played the smooth man really well and I believed his character. Jude Law may be an Englishmen, but he is not a goofy Englishmen like Michael Caine. Okay maybe he's a little goofy.
    SUSAN SARANDON is old and juggy. She came way too close to being naked in this movie. I freaked out man. I started having flashbacks to when Diane Keaton showed way too much of her withered old body in Something's Gotta Give. Diane Keaton and Susan Sarandon are too old… and decrepit to be doing that sort of thing. But I guess that quality made her a good choice for the "older woman" that Alfie plugs. I can't think of anyone better. I don't really want to think of anyone better.
    MARISA TOMEI is a good actress. I liked her in this movie and I wanted to see more of her character. It was hard though, because Alfie had to bounce around to tickle so many different women. She's sweet and charming and everything nice. I'd like to see her in more stuff. I know she's always making movies but I never see any of them. Maybe that's my fault. I totally met her cousin though. There was another chick in this movie too. I couldn't figure out what her name was though. She was hot and she showed her boobies a lot. It was awesome.

DIRECTION AND SCRIPT

    CHARLES SHYER and ELAINE POPE co-wrote the script, and Shyer also directed this movie. I feel like a royal douche because I can't compare this movie to the original. But maybe that's okay? Yeah, in my world it's okay because I'm sure they're two very different movies. This movie seemed very modern and slick much like the character of Alfie. I liked how Alfie would frequently narrate the movie by turning to the camera and talking right to the audience. It was weird because he would do it in the middle of a conversation with another character. I liked it though and I thought it was unique and it worked and added to the witty fast paced dialogue. Some may say that this movie doesn't work in modern times because the original was all about people being sexually promiscuous in the 60s. The purpose of the original was to open people's eyes and show that maybe that lifestyle wasn't okay and it had consequences. But I think that's just as much of an issue today with people not wanting to commit and just 'have fun." And With shows like Sex in the City being so popular maybe they should have made the movie with a female Alfie character. No, that's fucking stupid.

THE VERDICT

    The movie was better than I was expecting it to be. The acting, directing, and script were all pretty good. Overall I think it's just a hard idea to make into an entertaining movie, and in the end I just wanted more resolution. This movie is worth seeing I guess. But if you want to see a hilarious and touching movie about a guy who changes from his carefree lifestyle I would suggest About A Boy. Now there's a movie done right.
 
 

RATING: C +

Disagree with this review? Have a question?
Want to request a movie for G Baby to review?
Tell Him!!
gbaby@hollywoodguys.net


If you think these reviews taste good, you should sign up for The Hollywood Tickle! You will get a buffet of fun jammed right in your inbox!


ACTOR LIST~~MOVIE LIST~~DIRECTOR LIST~~SCREENWRITER LIST